Playing with Religious Toys

Often people plaster big ugly labels on our religious foreheads based on how they perceive we interpret scripture. Unfortunately, we're often mislabeled, and doomed to walk around sporting false labels when they don't represent what we actually believe. The quirky characterizations in the list below spotlights how some in the Church of Christ play with their toys; sadly enough, these one-liners present a lot of truth.

The following list, swiped at Sadistic Desire, provides humorous insight into what other people think we believe:

• Voodoo - "Let me borrow that doll for a second..."
• Confucianism - "Once a toy is dipped in water, it is no longer dry"
• Capitalism - "He who dies with the most toys, wins"
• Hari Krishna - "He who plays with the most toys, wins"
• Judaism - "He who buys the most toys at the lowest price, wins"
• Catholicism - "He who denies himself the most toys, wins"
• Anglican - "They were our toys first"
• Greek Orthodox - "No, they were OURS first"
• Branch Davidians - "He who dies playing with the biggest toys, wins"
• Mormonism - "Every boy may have as many toys as he wants"
• 7th Day Adventists - "He who plays with his toys on Saturday, loses"
• Amish - "Toys with batteries are surely a sin"
• Church of Christ - "He whose toys make music, loses"
• Baptist - "Once played, always played"
• Church of Christ, Scientist - "We are the toys"
• Jehovah's Witnesses - "He who 'places' the most toys door-to-door, wins"
• Non-Denominationalism - "Does it really matter where the toys came from?"
• Communism - "Everyone gets the same number of toys"
• Hedonism - "Hang the rule book! Let's play!"
• Atheism - "There is no toy maker"
• Polytheism - "There are many toy makers"
• Evolutionism - "The toys made themselves"